Wednesday, January 20, 2010

God is bigger than......

No, I'm not quoting cheesy lyrics to a worship song.

I'm trying to remind myself that God is actually big than _______________

Here is where I fill in the following:
- the death today of an 18 month old little girl I know and have been working with
- Stage 4 liver cancer in a 2 year old boy I work with
- a missing husband and father of 2 adopted boys I know
- the cancer invading the body of a 2 1/2 year old little girl
- Earthquakes wrecking havoc over a 3rd world country leaving millions who had nothing to start with, with even less

God....Abba....what is going on?

You're bigger than ALL of this, but right now, in my finite world.....You seem so small with me.

I mean no irreverence, honest. But what Abba is going on?

You can calm the storms of raging seas, you can move mountains, I've seen you remove cancer from someone's body, I've witnessed you saving a soul, you breath life into every living being, you conquered your own death......

It's all so fragile. All of it. Every moment. When I wake up and leave my house and get in my car. God, you could snatch the life right from my lungs.

God, you're bigger than this. You're bigger than me, bigger than cancer, bigger than earthquakes, you're bigger than life, you're bigger than.....death. I just wish I could feel and believe that right now.

Abba....I do my unbelief.

Tonight I will choose to be grateful for life. I choose to be grateful that rescue workers are still looking for David amongst the ruins of Hotel Montana because there are still signs of life.

Abba tonight I pray that you will perform a miracle and save David. I pray you will remove the cancer from Hezekiah and Eleanor's body.

And tonight I pray Abba that you would break my heart for what breaks yours, and stir me on towards passions of You. My hands are feeble and frail, but with You, they can do much. the least

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