Wednesday, July 29, 2009

This song made me weep tonight.... I love it. I can't wait for them to release it on an album.

I was able to see them to perform this live a few months back...incredibly moving

Lyrics:
Turn Down the Music
If were hungry would we give you food
If you were thirsty would we give you drink
And if you were a stranger, would we let you in?
What would be the song the sing we’d sing to you, but never mean?
Would it be an empty hallelujah to the King?

Turn down the music
Turn down the noise
Turn up Your voice oh God
And let us hear a sound
A people broken, willing to love
Give us Your heart oh God
A new song rising up….

And if you were naked, would we give you clothes
And if you were an orphan, would we give our home
And if you were in prison, would we visit you?
What would be the song the sing we’d sing to you, but never mean?
Would it be an empty hallelujah to the King?

Turn down the music
Turn down the noise
Turn up Your voice oh God
And let us hear a sound
A people broken, willing to love
Give us Your heart oh God
A new song rising up….

Bridge:
Let it be our worship
Let it be our true religion
In this world, but not of it
Holding onto our confession





Despite some aches that I am going through right now, this song puts things into a better perspective for me. That in itself makes me want to cry.

I guess I wonder what I'm really doing to "turn down the music". What "would be (is) the song I'd sing to you, but never mean, would it be an empty hallelujah to the King?"

There has been more going on in my brain and my emotions than I care to go into, especially on a blog, however I will say this. I have a tendency to turn up the music in a figurative and literal sense. Silence in deafening to me. I don't wan to think so I don't sit, I don't bask in silence, in fact I flee from it. Therefore, I not only miss out on what God is trying to work on in me, but also I miss out on how I am supposed to be truly living out the 2 things God asks of me: Love God, love others.....

I'm life feels so trivial, there's so much bigger than me and what crap I feel like I'm in and dealing with.....it's not right.

This blog is just a jumble of words, but I have a lot going on in my brain so I'll just end it here

Thursday, July 16, 2009

turmoil

.....I was hoping to do a better job keeping up with my journal, but life has been really chaotic for me between work and just being friggin' busy most nights of the week.

I hate it because it's 12:19 a.m. and I can't sleep. My soul is twisted in endless knots, therefore, my stomach is too. There has been a lot of turmoil in the relationships in my life recently and it bothers me to my core.

I admit that I have the ability to be confrontational, to address tough issues with people that you can tend to want to avoid. But I'm confrontational at times because my deepest desire is for peace. I don't like dissension, I don't like people arguing, it tears up my soul to have relational tension....I hate it, hate it, hate it. I'm passionate about my family and my friends and when those two worlds have turmoil and the waters get stirred up creating a storm of anger and hurt, frustration, and sadness....it creates turbulence in my life. It's consumes me, every facet, because I care deeply about those that matter to me....so much so that it keeps me up at night. The issues consume my thoughts, rob me of my joy, and make my soul ache. it's all I can think about, because all I want is for it all to be right, and I ache to make it right.

.....I can't seem to make it right lately. I can't seem to make it all work out and fall into place and make it work. Which is why I'm sitting here awake in the middle of the night. The relationships in my life aren't right, therefore nothing within me or around me feels right......it aches and I hate it.